A play for 3 people. Comedy. An appointment with a kayfologist

О книге

Автор книги - . Произведение относится к жанрам кинематограф / театр, пьесы и драматургия, зарубежная драматургия. Оно опубликовано в 2024 году. Книге не присвоен международный стандартный книжный номер.

Аннотация

Problems sooner or later arise in the life of each of us, but you don't always want some psychologist or a super newfangled coach to torment an already bleeding wound, while assigning a lot of expensive sessions. Our heroes went the other way, they went to an appointment with a kayfologist! An explanatory note for the director is attached at the end of the play.

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Attention! ALL COPYRIGHTS TO THE PLAY ARE PROTECTED BY THE LAWS OF RUSSIA, INTERNATIONAL LAW, AND BELONG TO THE AUTHOR. ITS PUBLICATION AND REPUBLICATION, REPRODUCTION, PUBLIC PERFORMANCE, TRANSLATION INTO FOREIGN LANGUAGES, AND MAKING CHANGES TO THE TEXT OF THE PLAY WHEN STAGED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN PERMISSION OF THE AUTHOR ARE PROHIBITED. THE PRODUCTION OF THE PLAY IS POSSIBLE ONLY AFTER THE CONCLUSION OF A DIRECT CONTRACT BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND THE THEATER.

A play in two acts. (It can be delivered as a one-act version).

(16+)

An explanatory note for the director is attached at the end of the play.

THE ACTORS

Antoine.

Emily.

Leon.

Action 1

Scene 1. A la cafe.

Cafe. Slightly dimmed light.

Two tables are set apart from each other. Emily is sitting at the first one, picking at her plate without much appetite, reading magazines, answering incoming messages from time to time. The second table is empty.

Leon enters, presses the phone to his ear with his shoulder, and carries a tray of food in his hands. Drops the phone, gets nervous. He puts the tray on an empty table, picks up the phone, sits down at the table, continues the phone conversation.

Leon (into the phone, loudly). Yes, yes, I'm listening. Nothing happened, I dropped the phone. I didn't fall asleep, no. I'm not neglecting your advice, my hands were just busy… yeah… well… Well, listen up… So what? And do you think it will give any results? (Strictly). Are you a psychologist or what? What kind of idiotic techniques are these? Where did you read this? You haven't grown a mustache yet, but you're already trying to build something out of yourself there. (Very rude). Go work at the factory, start earning honestly and stop fooling people's heads! And I will ask you to return the money that you took from me, otherwise I will write a statement about fraud! Too much for me, a psychologist!

He hangs up, freaks out. He begins to eat greedily.

Emily glances at the noisy visitor from time to time, but it's nothing more than mild curiosity.

Leon (eating, muttering to himself). Wherever you go, there are only impostors and scammers. Some one-day online courses are held, a certificate will be hung on the door and that's it, a specialist is ready. But the price tags are heavy for their services, as if they have twenty years of experience behind them. And so, most importantly, they are diligently trying to dig up something, to look for problems and complexities of a person that are supposedly worth paying attention to. And they find it! (To the viewer). Have any of you contacted a psychologist? At least once someone has had you come, and he says to you: "You are fine, there are no ailments, disorders, psychological traumas and depressive states, in a psychological sense you are completely healthy"! Has anyone ever said that to anyone? Yeah, they'll say how. They need to earn money. To beat off the rent, pay taxes, and live on something ourselves. And what will they get if they don't find or invent some problem that needs to be treated very urgently for at least eight to ten sessions. Crooks! Good-bye! The windbags!


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