Fairy Tales Kazochki
Авторы книги - Egor Ouzikov, Michael Ouzikov. Произведение относится к жанрам юмор и сатира, современная русская литература. Год его публикации неизвестен. Международный стандартный книжный номер: 9785448374661.
Fairy Tales «Kazochki» for adults and not only! Count Leo Tolstoy, the great Russian writer, so fond of illiterate children that once he went «to the local people» and became the director of small village school. To save money on textbooks, he wrote his famous Fairy Tales «Kazochki», which, with some fine-tuning, are relevant to our difficult today days.
Читать онлайн Egor Ouzikov, Michael Ouzikov - Fairy Tales Kazochki
© Michael Ouzikov, 2017
© Egor Ouzikov, 2017
© Michael Ouzikov, перевод, 2017
© Egor Ouzikov, перевод, 2017
© Croft Lara, дизайн обложки, 2017
© Peter Malkov, иллюстрации, 2017
Редактор Egor Ouzikov
ISBN 978-5-4483-7466-1
Создано в интеллектуальной издательской системе Ridero
To my children – Egor and Stephanie
«Count Lev Tolstoy
loved children a lot…»
Daniel Harms
Plum stone
(A true story)
Mother bought a bucket of plums and wanted to give them to the children in the afternoon.
Mother never ate plums before in her life and smelt them constantly. And she liked them. She really wanted to eat them.
When there was no one else in the room, she would not resist herself and ate the whole bucket.
At dinner, father asked, «Children, did anyone eat the plums?»
The children answered, «No.»
Then father said, «If any of you ate them – that’s not good of course, but not a trouble. The trouble is that plums have stones, and if someone does not know how to eat them and swallows the stone, then this person will die. That’s what I’m afraid of.»
Everyone laughed, but mother began to cry.
And next morning father died.
Soldier
(A true story)
There was a house on fire. No one could enter it, and honestly, wouldn’t even want to.
A soldier came over and said: «I’ll go.»
He was told: «You will burn.»
The soldier said: «One can’t die twice, and can’t escape once…»
And he ran into the house…
In fact, he was an extraordinary youth.
You wouldn’t understand them, the Slavs.
The Lion and the dog
(A true story)
Once upon a time in London*, they showed wild animals and took dogs and cats instead of money for watching.
The dogs and cats were used as feed for the wild animals.
One man wanted to look at the animals, so he grabbed a little dog on the street and brought it to the show.
He was admitted to watch and the little dog he picked up was thrown into the lion cage to be devoured. The dog dropped its tail between its legs and clung to the corner of the cage.
The lion came over and sniffed her.
The doggie squealed.
The she lay on her back, lifted her feet and began waving her tail.
The lion touched her with his paw, and flipped her over.
The doggie squealed.
They got married…
The doggie squealed.
Next morning, the doggie croaked and the lion’s lymph nodes began to swell.
* London is the capital of Great Britain
